Lately I have been meditating on the scripture in the book of Genesis regarding Lot removing his family from Sodom and Gomorrah. Escaping all she had ever known, Lot’s wife looked back and immediately turned into a pillar of salt. She was forever stuck in that same spot. One glance back to all that she was leaving behind fixated her in a place where she … Continue reading Lot’s Wife
It’s been quite a while since I’ve been here… Three years to be exact. I was off in the world living or at least keeping myself busy, thinking I was living. I had created this armor around my heart that couldn’t be penetrated. Love, love, love was the song I used to sing but now, there was a different tune I was humming. Self preservation. … Continue reading Merry Go Round
There are times when the smallest things trigger emotions within that cause a physical reaction. Sometimes its an upset stomach, racing heartbeat or a wave of nausea that won’t let up. All of these reactions come from outward stimuli of people triggering past trauma in my life that I thought was healed. Will it ever go away… Maybe or may be not in entirety. What … Continue reading PTSD- Relationship Trauma
I’ve repelled some really good men. Self sabotaged many attempts at having a healthy and loving relationship by holding fast to the empty promises of a married lover. Pretty words with no action behind them. I’d probably still be stuck by those words. I had to accept that healthy love doesn’t have someones actions continuously choosing another person over you, while feeding you fairytale bullshit … Continue reading I choose me…
Today, I thought about the story of Gideon and decided to re-read his story in the book of Judges. There are so many times when I have questioned God, his plan and how I fit into that plan. but God but why Why me But but but… There were many times when I had prayed for a sign and then another because I wanted to … Continue reading I will be with you…
It is time to unpack some of those issues… Trust and surrender, complete surrendering, I believe goes hand in hand. I have trust issues. It’s evident in how i continue to navigate in this world. Cautiously, trepidatiously. It’s apparent every time I step into the water. Each time I’m asked to let go and float on my back, I tense up and sink to the … Continue reading I have more issues than Cosmo…
He who find a wife finds a good thing… Proverbs 18:22 I hear so many women quoting this particular scripture and always stating that we are the prize. But are you really a good thing? What makes you a prize and a good thing? Beyond your good looks, fabulous career and great yoni, what attributes do you exude that qualifies you as a good thing? … Continue reading Are You A Good Thing
I recall a very specific time when I was in a bad place financially. I mean, real bad. I was working at my first law firm, only making $11.50 an hour. I was excited to finally be working in my field of choice but the pay, just wasn’t getting it. I had decided to apply for a position in a different department, bankruptcy. I figured … Continue reading Rejection is often God’s Way of Protecting Us
We are all worshippers!We were all built to worship God! We often times choose to worship other things. We set up idols in our lives because those are things that we can see and touch. The tangible!An idol can be anything that takes our focus off of God. We chase after relationships, career success, money, material things that will be ruined and replaced. We chase … Continue reading There’s a Worshipper in me
Maybe this disappointment occurred in my life to push me back to God… I had been running for so long. Distracting myself with so many other things and people. Until he said enough!!! I will get your attention somehow! (Not saying that God causes us to experience disappointment). We live in an imperfect world and we are bound to experience setbacks that knock the wind … Continue reading Draw Near to God and He will draw near to you… James 4:8
Some Place Trying to Be Still 